“As Any Mother Would,” Personal Narrative by Justin Baker ’24

As Any Mother Would

It was the quietest car ride. My sister glared through the window, expressionless. My dad was depressingly slouched in the driver’s seat. My mom kept her hand over her eyes, appearing hopeless. While the voices in the vehicle were mute, our minds were flooded with thoughts and emotions attempting to digest what we had just watched. Any words to describe the movie felt unworthy and imperfect. A film so riveting that it made a seven-minute drive home feel like an eternity. Even after reaching our destination, everyone remained dead silent. Anger and sorrow and frustration and weakness accounted for few of the ways I felt that evening. But the worst part about it was that these feelings were nothing new.

My entire life, I’ve never been the fondest of reading, especially on vacation. One could tan at the beach, play games at an arcade, go out for ice cream, even visit a museum. The possibilities are endless, but what do you decide to do instead? Spend the next hour of your life staring at countless pages full of tiny words on them. It never made much sense to me, but my mom, of course, thought otherwise. “Alright, Jus,” she hollered from the kitchen of our AirBNB rental in Martha’s Vineyard. “Time to read,” she demanded, like any mother would. Though I rolled my eyes as far back as I could, I pleasantly responded with an “OK.” Pulling myself out of bed, I grabbed a new story that I was forced to get the week prior, titled The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas. I didn’t know much about the book, but after reading the synopsis, it was the only one I could find that drew my attention. Starr Carter and her tale of two worlds, which is somewhat relatable to the one I live today. I opened the book, and Page 1 of my rollercoaster journey had begun. 

For the first time ever, I discovered a story that I couldn’t put down. I found myself constantly yearning for more information, flying through 50 pages a day. It was as if I was a magnet; not only because I was so attracted to the book, but because I was connected to the characters on a physical and emotional level. In my interpretation, the story projects the message that we are stronger together, not divided. After being face-to-face with the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend Khalil, Starr experiences the pressures and varying opinions from both sides of her community. The way students from Williamson Prep, a predominately white private school located in the wealthy part of her hometown, perceive Khalil to be perpetuating the stereotypes placed on people of color in our society. Their overall perception can be summed up as, “A drug dealer who had it coming, eventually.” Then, there are those who truly knew Khalil. Those that remembered him as the loving individual that was only trying to provide for his family before he was shot dead in the street by One-Fifteen; a racist police officer who saw his hairbrush as a “weapon.” However, despite the overwhelming amount of evidence that the officer was guilty of murder, the grand jury decided to not indict him. At this point in the story, I was enraged, yet not surprised. As previously stated, this was nothing new. Black people not getting justice in America’s corrupt system is almost expected in our world today. During this moment, I possessed a dim light of hope, praying the grand jury would make the right decision, but subconsciously, I already knew the outcome. However, it was the sense of unity and togetherness after the verdict that made me fall in love with this story. Everyone working together to achieve a common goal is precisely what we need to improve our country for the better. After all, it is our country that we have to live in, so it is that in which we need to fight for. 

In the following days, after eagerly telling my family about the tremendous novel, my sister discovered that The Hate U Give movie was scheduled to come out a few weeks later. I begged that we go to watch, but luckily for me, it didn’t take much convincing, as my parents were quickly on board with the idea. “All your school work better be done by then,” my mom stated, like any mother would. Excitement rushed through my body, but little did I know the effect that it would have on each of our lives in the coming weeks. 

And we watched. Though I thought the impact of the book would go unmatched, the movie blew that out the water. The story being brought to the big screen easily allowed the viewer to truly picture what was going on. For me, being able to watch the tear gas rain on innocent protestors hit a little harder. Seeing an 8 year old, innocent black boy pull out a gun on his own family hit a little harder. But most of all, watching loving parents having to give their young, black children “The Talk” hit a little harder, because so did I. “Jus, keep your hoodie off. Jus, take your hands out of your pockets. Jus, always know how to speak to a cop, and keep your hands visible,” my mom would constantly remind me, and still does to this day. When I was younger, I never completely understood why she emphasized these things so much. What’s wrong with my hoodie? or Why can’t I keep my hands in my pockets? I thought to myself. But as I grew older, and I numbly viewed George Floyd and Eric Garner and Breonna Taylor and Philando Castile and Alton Sterling and Stephon Clark perish before my eyes just as Khalil did, I finally got it. African-American lives are not cherished in our society. Since the beginning of time, we have been stereotyped as criminals and savages. The system that our country is built upon today is practically modern-day slavery, as it is meant to reinforce discrimination and injustice that we have tried so hard to get rid of. For these reasons are why I tend to keep my hoodie off and my hands out of my pockets. Because the reality is that my mother has two black children. She loves both of us, like any mother would. She cherishes us, like any mother would. But, just like those in The Hate U Give, she fears for us and our futures, like any mother of black children would.